Sean “Diddy” Combs has apologised and taken “full responsibility” for “all of the hurt and pain” he has caused others in a letter to the court, less than 24 hours before he is due to be sentenced.
The hip-hop mogul did not give evidence during his trial earlier this year, so this is the first time he has addressed Judge Arun Subramanian.
Combs was convicted of two prostitution-related charges in July, following a trial lasting almost eight weeks, but was cleared of more serious charges of sex trafficking and racketeering conspiracy.
In the letter, the 55-year-old admits “past wrongs” but says he is no longer running from his “many mistakes”.
He also addresses the infamous CCTV footage from an LA hotel in 2016, which showed him attacking his former girlfriend Cassie Ventura.
“First and foremost, I want to apologise and say how sincerely sorry I am for all of the hurt and pain that I have caused others by my conduct,” Combs writes. “I take full responsibility and accountability for my past wrongs.”
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The rapper describes the last two years – which started with a civil lawsuit filed by Cassie in November 2023 – as the “hardest” of his life, but admits: “I have no one to blame for my current reality and situation but myself.”
Since his arrest in September 2024 and subsequent time in prison, the rapper says he has “had to look in the mirror like never before” and admits his “downfall was rooted in my selfishness”.
Combs is due to be sentenced on Friday and faces a maximum of 20 years in prison.
Prosecutors have called for at least 11 years, while his defence team argues he should serve no more than 14 months. The latter would see him walk free almost immediately after time already served.
His letter comes after several filed by witnesses who testified during the trial, including Cassie, who has urged the judge not to be lenient and expressed fears for her safety.
She alleged on the witness stand that she was coerced and sometimes blackmailed into taking part in sex sessions with male escorts. Combs has strenuously denied allegations of sexual abuse, and jurors cleared him of sex trafficking, only finding him guilty of the charges relating to hiring the sex workers.
However, his legal team admitted from the beginning that he had been violent in the past.
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Cassie Ventura gave evidence during the trial. Pic: Reuters/Jane Rosenberg
‘I could not forgive anyone putting a hand on one of my daughters’
Talking about the 2016 CCTV footage – which showed Combs, wearing only a towel and socks, attacking Cassie in a hallway – he says in his letter: “The scene and images of me assaulting Cassie play over and over in my head daily.
“I literally lost my mind. I was dead wrong for putting my hands on the woman that I loved. I’m sorry for that and always will be. My domestic violence will always be a heavy burden that I will have to forever carry. The remorse, the sorrow, the regret, the disappointment, the shame.”
He goes on to say he feels sorry “for something that I couldn’t forgive someone else for: if they put their hands on one of my daughters.”
The footage was played several times during his trial after first being made public by CNN in May 2024.
The hip-hop mogul also references “Jane”, another former girlfriend who testified against him in court, who did not give her real name.
“I thought I was providing for Jane concerning her and her child, but after hearing her testimony, I realised that I hurt her,” he writes. “For this I am deeply sorry. I lost my way … Lost in the drugs and the excess.”
Combs fell to his knees when the verdict was delivered. Pic: Reuters/Jane Rosenberg
‘The old me died in jail’
Combs goes on to describe his time in prison, saying he has been “humbled and broken to my core” and that there “have been so many times that I wanted to give up”.
“The old me died in jail and a new version of me was reborn. Prison will change you or kill you – I choose to live.”
Combs says he has had therapy and has been “working diligently to become the best version” of himself, and that there has been some good to come out of his time in prison.
“For starters, I am now sober for the first time in 25 years. I have been trying my best to deal with my drug abuse and anger issues and take accountability as well as positive steps towards healing.”
Asking Judge Subramanian for “mercy” for himself, his seven children and his 84-year-old mother, he says: “I have failed my children as a father. My father was murdered when I was three years old so I know first-hand what it is to not have a father. More than anything, I just want the opportunity to return home and be the father that they need and deserve.”
Combs goes on to say he is “scared to death” at the thought of spending more time away from his family, and that he no longer cares “about the money or the fame”.
And as previously detailed by his lawyers, he describes conditions at the Metropolitan Detention Centre in Brooklyn as inhumane – but says he is not looking for “pity or sympathy”, and that his time there has “changed me forever!”.
Combs concludes by vowing to never commit another crime again: “I can’t change the past, but I can change the future … I’m committed to the journey of remaining a drug free, non-violent and peaceful person.
“Today, I humbly ask you for another chance – another chance to be a better father, another chance to be a better son, another chance to be a better leader in my community, and another chance to live a better life.”
